Chapter 20 - Too Late For Praying

Turning the knob to open the door of their office, Beth says pushing it open, "I hope this isn't a catastrophe."  

Chapter 19 - That Fateful Night

Beth and Tony start to prepare dinner.  Tony mans the grill, while Beth throws together a salad.  

Chapter 18 - Just Sticks and Bricks

Jon, removing his earphones and resting them on the stool exits the booth when he sees Beth with Tony.  

Chapter 17 - Words Can't Say

Beth is in her home office, doing profit and loss reports for the vineyard they just bought, with little information that the Vincenne's were able to provide her. 

Chapter 16 - I Wanna Make You Feel Naughty

Beth was sound asleep when Jon comes creeping in, as well as the other members of his family.  He goes up to check on everyone, tucking in the ones that needed to be tucked and turning down the lights of those that were afraid of the dark.  He checked on Beth last.  He slowly opened their bedroom door and was met with a beautiful breeze coming on over the water.  He inhales deeply as he kicks off his shoes and drops his jeans, on her side of the bed.  There was a low light cascading from Beth's walk in closet.  Jon can see that she's on her belly, with one leg drawn up to her side.  She was half on Jon's side and half on hers.  

Jon reached down and gently pulled the 1500 thread count sheet off her, sliding it not wanting to wake her.  She stirs as if she was getting chilled.  He freezes and waits for her to settle.  He stands there, naked and feeling great about her and about them.  He knows what he wants to do, but should he?  He doesn't know the kind of day that she's had and it's possible she's completely exhausted.  He weighs his options, smiles and slowly lifts the sheet, kissing his way up her leg, under the covers.  His kisses were tender, his caresses were gentle and his tongue was warm and wet.  He loves her legs, kissing up one side and down the other until she wakes enough to realize what he's doing.  In an expressive mood herself, Beth rolls over onto her back, giving her husband the room that he needs to continue with his kissing and his touching.  She rarely refuses such an amazing act of togetherness, an emotional connection and the amazing orgasm she knew that was heading her way.  She let her husband pleasure her with his lips, his tongue, his fingers and his words.  She tried to resist, she tried to lay there and enjoy it without letting him know, but it didn't last long.  

She grabs his head, holding him in place, loving the pattern that he's making with his tongue, not wanting him to change a thing.  He's on her spot, THE spot and she doesn't want him to stop.  Jon loves that she's thrusting into his face, moving her body in the motion that feels right for her.  He slides his hands under her ass and pulls her closer, tighter to his face.  When he starts to dart in and out, she lets out a noise.  A slight moan ending with a gasp for air.  Jon knows she's just about there.  Beth's hands and pulling his hair, moving him the way she needs him to be and that is a big turn on for Jon.  "Don't stop!"  she cries out.  "Right there, right there."  She firmly holds his head in place.  With one hand, aroused, he slides his hand up her body and finds her breast.  He squeezes it, plays with her nipple, running it back and forth between his fingers.  He knows that her nipples are her most sensitive, plus he loves to play with them.  After a few moments of his tongue penetrating her and his fingers teasing her nipples, Beth wants her husband deep inside of her.  The handfuls of hair that she has pulls him up from between her legs and as she kisses him, she says, "Fuck me!"

Jon smiles like a kid in a candy story when he gently slides himself into her.  She takes him in as if he was made for her.  She kisses him, giddily at first, but then it intensifies.  She takes hold of him and darts her tongue into his mouth, kissing him as deep as her tongue will go and he is a very willing participant.   As they make love, Jon looks down at her and asks, "Are you mad I woke you?"

Beth smiles, nibbles his chin and tells him as a matter of fact, "If this isn't the best orgasm of my life, yes, I'll be mad."

"They're all the best, you know that."

Beth wraps her legs around him, as well as her arms.  She lets her passion for her husband flow, without inhibition.  She loves the way that he feels, the way that they feel together.  Her body moves in rhythm with his and in no time, once they focused, they got off together - the noises were proof that it was amazing.  

Jon rolled off her and caught his breath before he asks her, "Are you mad I woke you?"

Beth looks at him, as she brushed the hair that's stuck to her face from sweat says, "I think we need to do it again.  Give me two to chose from."  She rolls on her side and starts to rub his hairy belly and his amazing chest, "So that gives you two changes to save yourself."

He winks at her, "Can I have a minute?"

She nods.  She has to pee, so she gets up to do her business.  When she comes out of the bathroom, he's not in bed.  She can see the french door that goes onto their deck, so she heads that way.  He's out there leaning on the cement rail, smoking a cigarette.  "Wow, was it that good?  You need a cigarette."

He reaches to hand her the cigarette, "Want some?"  

"No thanks."  she is satisfied just breathing in his smoke.  She leans on the marble railing and looks out over the water.  "What a beautiful night.  How was your trip into the city?"

Jon drops his cigarette into the container that he has out there for occasions such as this.  His smoking is to a minimal now, never doing it in the house or in front of the kids.  His desire to smoke right now has been squashed by the naked woman that is leaning over the deck railing.  His attention totally focused on her perfect body.  He can smell her and she smells like sex

With one finger, he traces the path of her spine.  From her perfect ass all the way to the nape of her neck, he smiles as he watches her shiver, either from his touch or the cool night breeze.  "What are you doing?"  Beth turns her head to look back at him but she doesn't stop him from what he's doing.  

"Looking at you." he tells her, his finger going back down her spine.  Rearranging his footing, Jon lines himself up behind her, spreading her legs with his foot.  His hand slides up her back and stops at her neck, holding her in position.  Within seconds he's deep inside her again, holding her hips, showing her how much he loves her one thrust at a time.  

Chapter 15 - We Gotta Hold On

Jon and Beth made the best of the little time away that they were afforded, inseparable with a love rekindled.  

Chapter 14 - Can't Win, If You're Not Afraid To Lose

As he takes off his life vest, Jon can see this amazing image walking toward him, with two cups of juice in her hands.

Chapter 13 - Tonight I swear, I'd Sell My Soul

Long walks on the sandy beaches with the moon beams dancing on the water, when Jon looks at Beth, he can see that she's glowing and that the glow now comes from deep within.  That makes him smile.  As they walk, his hand on the small of her back, to let her know that he's there, he can feel them reconnecting.  Finding one another.  The conversations are just a few words at at time, but that's really all that they need.  To know one another like they do, they could go days without talking, really.  They are so in tune with each others personalities, so in tune with each others needs that they somehow lost all of that.  As they walk, Jon draws her closer and whispers into her ear, Why didn't we do this long ago?"

Beth kind of chuckles and reminds him, "We have a family, small children, careers and several social commitments - it's kind of hard to get away and go off the radar."

"We still should have done it years ago.  No kids, no phones, no security.  This is what I call heaven."

She looks to her husband with longing in her eyes, a longing that remains as her thoughts go back to the trip they took down to St Bart's and spent the time on a yacht.  The time that she was seriously hurt and had to be flown to the nearest hospital.  "Do you remember when we were new and we took that yacht trip?"

"How could I forget?"  His hand slides from the small of her back and gently he takes her hand.  A gentle squeeze.  "That was the FIRST worst time of my life.  You laid there lifeless and I had no idea what to do."

"But you saved me." she reminds him, with a kiss on the cheek.  "Do you remember our first date?"

"Las Vegas?"  His smile goes from ear to ear and he's reminded of just how strong he felt about her.  How badly he wanted her in his life.  At first sight, she had his heart and she knew it.  "Do you remember the good times that we had at the house in upstate New York?  I loved going up there."

Beth's memories of that place are not all happy ones.  She had some turmoil up there and there are days that she wishes she could forget those.  "What about the time we spent at the vineyards?"

"You love those places." A look comes over his face as he quickly thinks, "Are you mad at me that I asked you to give those up?"

Beth stops walking, stopping him in his tracks too.  "I didn't give them up, I just don't visit as often as I like.  The one in Jersey gave Tony such a beautiful wedding, that I will always cherish.  And yes, the one in California gave me immense grief, but it was a passion.  I loved vinting, growing and overseeing both places."

"So you're not mad?" he hesitates.

She smiles coyly at him, "Mad, no.  Going to give them up completely?  Again, no.  I need that Jon."

"Why?"

"The twins are getting bigger.  The bigger kids are all in school and gone with Dot 50% of the time.  I get bored and need to stay busy."

They decide to sit on their secluded part of the each, just outside there suite.  They get entangled in one another as much as they can and Jon begins again, "Have we had more good times than bad times?"

Beth leans in and rests her head on his shoulder, "I think that we've had more bad times, but the good times, when they were good, they were great and they shadowed the bad.  The good are what got us here today and without those bad, terrible and unimaginable things - we wouldn't be WHO we are today."  She pauses again to collect the right words, "The Beth and Jon that we were when we met could have never survived what we did.  We grew as people, apart as husband and wife but here we are, fighting for the most amazing thing in our life.  Our marriage."

Chapter 12 - Naked In Her Garden

Jon and Beth decided that a week, or two in Italy would be far enough away for it to be one on one and close enough to get on the jet and fly home at a moment's notice, if need be.

Chapter 11 - You know everything about her

"Beth,  can you see why Jon may feel that way?"

Beth's eyes turn to Jon, "Do you really think I feel that way, that I blame you for the murder of our daughter?"

"I do."

"If I truly blamed you, do you think I'd be sitting here trying to figure all of this out?"  

"I'm not sure,  but when I think about it, I think yeah, you blame me.  Look at all the times you ran off.  That kind of tells me that you were angry with me, needed to get away from me...."

Beth interrupts him, "or maybe to deal with all of the madness in my head."

Dr. Fishman leads forward, with a polite step in, "Madness, what do you mean Beth?"

She pauses for a moment, "In my head, I'm responsible for her death.  I brought Dalton into my life and that set all of the madness, the hurt and terror in our lives."

He gives her a warm smile, "You know neither of you are responsible for McKenna's death.   You are not responsible for other people's actions."

Beth repositions herself, trying to get the subject to change as she's feeling uncomfortable, "I know that but had i not refused Daltons advances,  left him for Jon and hurt him, maybe he wouldn't have been so hellbent on destroying my life, killing my daughter.  He and that bitch Melissa,  along with Jon's former wife plotted this, planned it and carried it out."  She continues to wipe the tears from her cheeks, "Yeah, Melissa killed her, but I don't think she was the mastermind, she wasn't smart enough."

"So you should have made a life with Dalton?  Had you done that, you never would have had the joy that you had being McKenna's mother.  Holding her in your arms, kissing her face,  feeding her from your breast."  The doctor asks her, pretty confident in what her answer may be.

Beth looks him in the eye,  "would I have traded that?  Being with Dalton to avoid the loss of my daughter?"

"I guess that could be the question."

Jon gets involved now, "That's assnine!"

"Here me out Jon."  Dr. Fishman holds up a hand.  "I think Beth is in a place where she thinks she should have bargained for a different outcome."

"I am not."  Beth stands up and starts to pace the elegant New York office.   "I'm certain that had I been more diligent on the care and safety of my daughter, shed be here with us today."

Dr Fishman gets up and walls toward Beth, Jon watching every move they make, hanging on every word.  "But she's not here and you and Jon need to learn to push passed this,  even though you think it's impossible."

"How?" Jon demands, getting to his feet.  "How do we do that?  We blame ourselves and maybe subconsciously each other.  How can we do it?"

"Time and maybe a few more visits here to see me, but I think the first thing you need to do is maybe take some time away, alone together.   Some place you can relax and just be husband and wife.  Yes, you're a husband and wife with great losses and many obstacles, but you're a husband and wife that truly love one another. "

Both Jon and Beth pause, look at one another.  Jon can see a smile wanting to creep up on Beth's face, "A vacation?  We can't get away right now."  Jon reminds Beth as he focuses his gaze upon Dr. Fishman.  "Now is the worst time for that."

"Right now that's the only thing you can do.  You two need to get away and reconnect.  Get away and remember why you're here and why you're still fighting to be together after all you've been through."

"We're fighting because that's all we got." Beth boasts, trying to hide the fact that she's terrified of losing her husband and her family.  "We fight because we know that we need to."

"Need?"  Dr Fishman questions.  "Need is a pretty strong word.  You need to stay together?"

"Of course we do, we have a family together."  Beth needs to remind the doctor.

Dr. Fishman moves in close to Beth, with his hand on her shoulder her tells her, "Many people co parent that aren't together anymore, Beth."

Jon feeling the doom of what a real separation from her would mean and it starts to make him anxious.   "Do you think a vacation could help?"  He drags his fingers through his hair, "Cause I'd take her to the moon if it would help."  He plops down on the couch, not sure what to do anymore. 

Dr. Fishman sits next to his exhausted and broken client,  "You guys need to get back to you.  Where you were when you fell in love, back before your tragedy, back before the bottom fell out of your world."  He pauses, takes a cleansing breath and follows that with, "You need to see the woman that you fell in love with and she needs to see the man that used to sweep her off her feet."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jon and Beth leave their session with Dr. Fishman hand in hand, feeling raw and vulnerable.   They know he's right about what he said, they know they should follow his advice.   As far as they're concerned, he's never been wrong. Jon draws Beth closer, squeezing her hand and kissing the side of her head.   "Beth,  you have to know that I have never seen you as anything other than my wife, my best friend, my lover and my soul mate; even after everything you, everything we have been through.   You have always, and I mean always been the most beautiful woman in the world.  You're an amazing mother to our children and mine, and even though you piss me off, I can't imagine my life without you."

Beth stops walking, as they were on their way to the parking garage and looks in her husband eyes,  "You have saved me many times, even during the times that I wanted to die.  You have always been my rock.  Jon, you're the love of my life and had I not met you, so much never would have happened.  Our losses,  our joys and most of all the twins.  You have given me more than I ever could have hoped for in a husband, a mate and a best friend."  On her tippy toes, she reaches up and kisses his chin, "Jon Francis, where shall we holiday?"  Her smile reaches her eyes.

"YOU want to go away?"  Jon can't believe what he's just heard.  A few moments earlier, Beth acted as if a vacation was the last thing that she she would ever do, at this point.  "I'm sure Pete will stay with the kids and I have no doubt your mother will love the opportunity to check in on them."

Jon tosses his head back and laughs, knowing what she's just said was true.  "No doubt about mom, she's been chomping at the bit to take the kids away for a few days."

"We should let her."  Beth walks into him, his lips land on her forehead.  She stands there for a moment, absorbing the caresses she craved from her husband.  His hands, slowly up and down her back, "Let's walk."  She adds.

Together they walk from the therapists office, with no direction in mind.  Both are in basic disguise with sunglasses, but it wasn't a concern.  Not today.  Together, at this very moment, they both have all that they need.  Each other and the desire to get back to where they were - where they fell in love, all of those years ago.  As far back as that night in the Las Vegas desert where they first felt, where they knew that they needed to be together, regardless of what was going to happen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 10 - Secrets We'll Take To The Grave

The silence forced Jon to take a look at himself, from the inside.  He quickly looks back at their losing of McKenna and he remembers when he got the call that she lost the twins.   He recalls the time that she was raped and assaulted by Dalton.  All of the times that he's just run through his mind, he was absent.  Whether it was physically or emotionally,  maybe he wasn't there for his wife, in her most trying of times.   The tears that roll down his cheeks when he looks at his wife hurt him, but not nearly as much as looking at her broken soul.  He can finally see that she's shattered on the inside and he can see that just maybe he could have prevented some of it.   He slides over to his wife, taking her face into his hands.  He kisses her nose, "Baby,  I'm so sorry if I let you down.  I'm so sorry if I wasn't there for you.  I'm so sorry if I pushed you too far, too fast."

Beth's eyes still burn from her tears and the ones that follow hurt just the same.  She grabs Jons hands, "You didn't let me down, Jon."

Dr. Fishman interrupts them,  "Being let down isn't the issue here, the issue is where you go from here."

"What do you mean?  Go from here?"

Dr Fishman leans back in his chair, "Well, it looks to me like there is alot unsaid and feelings that have been buried.   Beth, how do you feel about what Jon just said?"

"Honestly, I didn't feel much.  It's all things he's said before."

"Is there anything you'd like to say?  Maybe ask him?"

Beth looks at Jon and mumbles, "Was I so far gone that you needed to start divorce proceedings?"

"Yeah,  when you would disappear like you did, Beth what was I supposed to do?"

With snarky tone she snapped, "Oh, I don't know, try to figure out why and help me through what I was going through."

"I tried." He lowly barks back.  "I did the best I could."

Beth lowers her head to muster the courage to say, "I lost children and it seems that at times, your only concern was the next album, the tour schedule or whatever project you were working on."

"I still needed to make a living, fulfill contracts Beth."

"And never grieve yourself?"  Dr. Fishman asks of Jon.  "Have you fully processed all of this yourself, dealt with the loss, work through the pain?"

"I think so." He responds.

Beth looked to him, "You have not.  You dove into work and turned the blind eye."

"No I didn't."

Beth sighs, "You rearranged a few dates, but when you were home, you were in the studio, meeting with management and so on.  I was left alone to deal with it all on my own and get on with life."

Dr. Fishman interjected, "Is that true Jon?" 

Jon can't answer that on the fly, he needs to think about it.  "I did what I needed to do to try to deal with my loss in my way.  Work is always therapeutic for me.  You've know that from day one babe."

"You acted like work is all you had!"  Beth blurts at him, feeling a surge of emotion she hasn't felt in a very long time.  She stops herself when Melissa pops into her memory.  That ping of pain hurt her to the center of her being, "until Melissa."  She adds.

Jon can't help but be taken back by that.  He can't help but feel the guilt that engulfs him like a cocoon.  He sees the look on his wife's face and then it hits him.  All of this time he thought she's dealt with his infidelity,  with his one night indiscretion,  but it's painfully obvious that she hasn't.  He can see that she's punishing him for it, she's continuing to make him pay.  He's just not sure if she knows that's what she's doing.  "Beth, that was ages ago."  He simply replies, knowing that they just crossed a line they needed to cross a long  time ago.

"Maybe for you, but it feels just like yesterday for me."  She thinks she can finally talk about it, even though the lump in her throat and the butterflies in her stomach might try to stop her. 

Dr. Fishman sits back and let's the two of them discuss whatever it is that falls out of their mouths.   He's been their therapist long enough to know that it's time they deal with their demons and put the past behind them. 

"I thought we were passed that?"  Jon quietly asks his wife, his best friend.  "Are you still struggling with that babe?"

Beth nods her head, talking his hand in hers,  "Daily, I think."

"What do you mean?"

"Honeslty Jon,  I haven't thought about her in forever."

"But you treat me like it happened yesterday."  Beth sees his confusion and she can hear his sincerity.  Both tap at her fractured heart, "I think you punish me still for what I did way back when."

Beth leans back on the couch, not letting his hand go.  She draws in a deep breath and thinks about what he's just said to her, in front of a witness.  Her mind flashes back to being snippy with him about even the littlest of things.  She's treated him poorly and maybe she's just been shown why!?!  "I forgave you for that."  Beth stresses that.  "Jon, I put that in the past!"

"Do you?  I think you blame me for Kenna's death."

"I do not!"

"I think deep down you're mad at me for cheating on you, and had I not cheated on you, we'd still have McKenna.  So, since we don't have McKenna because of my indiscretion,  you blame me."

Chapter 9 - Do We Got It, Again?

The ride into the city was silent.   Stuck in traffic with each other, Jon and Beth didn't feel the need to break the tension with small talk.  They are in a place, literally and in their marriage that small talk is just noise.  Beth can feel her husband looking at her.  She wonders what he's thinking but will wait for later to find out what his thoughts might have been.  She knows he's not happy and she can honestly say that she feels the same way. 

The skyscraper looked taller than it was, as Beth looked up at it.  She can't help but feel her size, due to its size.  She felt small, she felt insignificant as they entered the building on West 142nd st.  A place they have visited from time to time over the years, but as she made her way into the revolving door, she couldn't help but also feel that maybe they haven't visited enough.  Her pant suit felt stifling and she noticed her hand was sweating, as it clasped Jon's tightly.  She didn't like the way that it felt, but she couldn't let go.  Over the top of her Prada sunglasses she said to her husband, "I love you."

He looked to her and gave her hand a tug, pulling her into him, he chuckled, "I love you."  He leans over and kisses her forehead, "Babe, we're gonna be okay."

Beth rests her head on his shoulder and whispers, "I know.  I just feel like we're going to death row."

"It'll be over before you know it."  He reassures her, feeling the intense pressure that he's put on himself.  

The elevator to the 21st floor took what felt like an eternity, stopping along the way to take on and left off other passengers.  When the door opened on the 21st, the couple took their leave and walked down the long hallway to the office that they needed to go to.  After they checked in and waited for their turn, the receptionist told them, "Dr. Fishman will see you now."  And she escorts them to his office. 

After Jon and Beth get settled, one at each end of the couch, Dr Fishman makes his entrance.  He hugs Beth hello and shakes Jon's hand.  "Its been a while."  He jokes with his patients,  "I was thinking about you two the other day when I seen you in the news Jon.  How are things?"  He takes his seat in his psych chair, leather bound binder on his lap.  

"That's why were here doc."  Jon states as a matter of fact.  "We've come to a point where we think we may benefit from some outside help."  Beth sits there, her legs crossed at the ankles, her hands folded neatly in her lap.  She nods in agreement.

"What's been going on?" He asks them, jotting notes on his tablet.   "Has something happened?"

Jon and Beth look to one another.  Without looking away from his wife, Jon answers honestly, "She's over doing it and I don't like it."

Immediately Beth adds, "He's suffocating me and making me feel incompetent as a mother and a wife."

The doctor asks, "What's precipitated these actions?  Beth are you overdoing it and Jon are you suffocating her?"

Beth quickly fires, "He doesn't let me do anything, so how can I possibly be overdoing it?"  Her eyes go back to Jon.

"I don't suffocate her.  She's free to come and goes as she pleases."

"Always?"

"Yes, but what has her pissed off is that I make her take the nanny or she has to have additional security."

"Why is that?"  The good doctor asks.  "Why does she have to have a guard or a nanny with her?"

Jon leans back and kicks his foot up to rest on his knee.  The foot starts to shake, a sign that Beth has learned that means he's stressed.  "I don't want anything to happen to her, or my kids."

"Does she put them in dangerous situations?"

"No."

"Does she neglect the kids?"

"No."

Beth is watching the volley of conversation and is a little bored with them.  She just wants to get to the nitty gritty.

Dr. Fishman pauses, "okay, why the additional staff then?"

Jon fidgets a little, "Because I think she needs help, she can on some days have 6 kids pulling her in a million directions."

Beth jumps in here, "Four of them are pretty self sufficient and the 3 older ones are hardly ever home."

"The twins are ALOT to handle Beth."  She can hear Jon's words and they hurt just as much as his actions have, as of late.

"They're my children,  they are not too much to handle."  

Jon's posture changes just enough for Dr Fishman to notice.  "Jon, I seen your body language change as she said that, why?"

"She can handle them at home, but away from the house, I want her to have help if she needs it."

Beth can't bite her tongue any longer, "A while back, the kids and I flew out to see him for a show.  Just me and the kids.  We're not there but a few hours and he chartered a plane to have the nanny come to where we were, because he thinks I'm not capable."

Dr Fishman is surprised by that.  "Why did you do that Jon?  Does it have anything to do with the demons from your past?  The people or the things that have happened to you two, the tragedy and loss?"

"It has everything to do with that!" He snaps.  "Look,"  he takes a deep breath and takes her hand, "she's a beautiful woman that has a past.  A past that has almost destroyed me as a man and my family."

"She's not her past and you can't keep punishing her for it, and you can't keep her from her future."

"That's not what I'm doing."  

Beth continues to listen to them,  absorbing what they're saying.  It was after what Jon said that made a light go on in Beth's head, so she asks, "Are you trying to keep me from leaving again?"  Her eyes are locked on his.  She can see the brightness fade in his eyes.   Did she just expose him for what he was doing?  "Are you afraid that I'll run off and try to get rid of my past, deal with the demons I have?"

Jon answers her honestly, "I don't think so.  I'm trying to keep you safe."

"From who?"  Dr Fishman questions, continually taking notes.  "Who are you keeping her safe from?  Herself?  Outside sources?"

"I don't know.  I just don't want my wife to hurt ever again, like she has before."

Quite frankly Dr Fishman tells Jon, "No one could have saved her from that.   You both were hurt by that Jon, do you feel Beth is in protection mode for you?"

"I've never been the target.  And I could have protected her from that.  Extra security.  I could have vetted Melissa, I could have done so much more than I did."

"I could have too."  Beth slams her fist on the couch cushion, "I could have done more."

There's a moment of silence.  Jon and Beth keep their eyes fixed on Dr. Fishman.  When he starts to talk again he looks to Beth.  "You had two babies die in uertro and one was taken from you from an unstable woman.  You were raped and physically assaulted," he looks to Jon.  "Have either of you dealt with that?  Any of that?"

"Yeah."  Jon replies.

Beth looks at Jon.  Her eyes are burning so bad from the tears that are welling in her eyes.  She mumbles, "yeah, kind of."

Another silence.  This one makes Jon and Beth a little uncomfortable.  Dr Fishman knows what he's doing.  He's bringing up the worst things they've been through and now he's making them think about it.  In a room together.

Chapter 8 - Last Cigarette? ?

"Ya know Beth, I got better things to do than sit here and try to convince you why I did what I did was in the best interest of my family."  He drops his head, "So this is it.  Pete is here, she's going to stay and you're going to utilize her to the best of her ability."

"No I'm not."  she buffs, "She needs a life too Jon, outside of our kids."

"She has a life.  Don't you think I asked her, and asked her again, if she was okay with coming here?"  He can feel himself getting mad at having to explain himself to her. 

Pete has been with the family for many years.  She's been instrumental in the raising of the Bongiovi children, Jon,  Tony's and Matt's.   It would tear Jon apart if he thought he was hurting Lupetta or hindering her life in anyway.  Pete is often given,  sometimes ordered to take time off and away from the family - even though she's part of the family.   She's paid quite handsomely and has the life that many could only pray for.  "Jon, this really isn't about Pete.  It's about your inability to see that I'm capable of taking care of our children,  whether it be home or away "  She slams her hand on the table, wanting him to look at her.  To see the emotion on her face,  in here eyes.

He's done with this discussion, he knows it's only going to go in a circle, with no good outcome.  He knows he's pissed her off, he knows she feels betrayed, but he didn't care.  "Damn it Beth, this discussion is over.  She's here, she's staying and I have work to do.  Do you mind?"  He gives her a look and motions to the door.  "Go shopping, do whatever you're going to do, but take Pete with you."  She shoots him the stink eye and that makes him just a touch more upset.   "Would you rather I get you a plane home?"

Beth stands there staring at him, herself getting upset over his callousness about the situation.  She can see that he is in fact done with the conversation, but she's not.  She knows him well enough to know that he'll utter not another word about it.  She could go on and on, but to him, the subject is closed.  Needing Jon to know how belittled she feels, how betrayed his actions hurt her, she mumbles, "Yes.  Get me a plane, we're going home."

"Are you kidding me?" He jumps to his feet, throwing his pen across the table.  "I have a show in 3 hours and you want me to get you a plane?"

Hand on hip,  Beth states, "You offered.  Yes, I want to go home."

"You're being childish." He screams at her.  The veins on the side of his face expanding. 

"You're being an asshole."  She balks back at him.  "Don't do something behind my back and get upset that I'm upset.  Don't offer me something that has no merit Jon, you're being a total ass."

"You wanna go home?"  He asks her in a tone that says that her next word will be all but in concrete.  Her answer will be definite and she'll get exactly what she wants.

"I do."  She answers and holds her breath.

She watches his every move, every move deliberate and necessary.  She sees him take his phone off the table.  He enters his lock screen code and then he swipes.  Swipes some more.  When he finds who he was looking for, he makes a phone call.  Beth's posture softens and she leans against the conference table, her heart beats just a little faster.  She tries to figure out who he's calling.  She has no idea.

What she hears next will infuriate her even more, "My wife is being a child.  Please charter her a plane to get her ass back to Jersey."

A momentary silence.

"Yeah, she'll have the kids with her."

He ends the call.  As he does he looks over the table at her, "Your wish is my command."  The smirk follows.

"Fuck you!"  She screams at him and leaves the conference room.  She's so pissed,  she doesn't acknowledge Richie and Dave as they sit outside and wait.  They look at one another and know that going back into that meeting will not be good.

When Beth makes her way back to their suite, she greeted by Haley.  Her phone in his hand.   "Dad wants to talk to you."  Beth smiles at the handsome young man and winks.

"Thanks Jake."

Beth takes her phone and sees that it's a connected call.  To keep the kids and Pete from hearing their argument she takes her business into the bathroom.  With a deep breath, she says "what" into the phone. 

"You're really leaving?"  He blurts with attitude, Dave and Richie can hear it all. 

"We are."

"There's a plan for you at the airport.  Leave Pete and the kids here."

Beth sits on the toilet, crossing her legs.  "No.  I'm taking my kids home, where maybe, just maybe I can take care of them myself."

"God damn it Beth.  You flew them all of the way out here to see me, take your attitude and go, but leave the kids."

She's now beyond livid, finally seeing the writing on the wall.  "Pete can stay here and take care of our children alone, but I'm incapable?"  Her sarcasm gets snarkier as she continues, "That's a bunch of bullshit.  All of the kids are leaving with me, so in your desire to control every aspect of my life Jon, did you get a plane big enough for all of us?"

Jon sighs and stands, to do his ritualistic pacing, "Why don't you just stay, take the kids to the show tonight, you know they want to go."

"They've been to enough." She reminds him.  "We came out to surprise you and in the end, I get a slap on the face for doing it."

Jon is quiet for a moment.  Finally he conceeds to her irrational behavior, having better things to do than to coddle to his oldest child.   "Flight leaves at 6:30.  I have Dawn get you the info."  He ends the call.

Beth sits in the privacy of the bathroom, running the events through her mind, and it just gets her even more enraged.   Once she composes herself, she exits her privacy and joins her family.  She stands there and looks them over, one by one.  The twins are poking and swiping on their iPad.  Jesse and Jake are lost in their iPhones and Pete is sitting there wondering what will happen next. 

Once Beth has it all clear in their heads, she tells the kids, "okay, we need to get ready for dads show.  After that, we're getting on a plane and going home."

Jesse immediately asks, "What about shopping?"

Beth gives him a sullen smile and tells him, "We'll hit the city when we get home."

Beth can see the look on his face,  "I'm sorry Jess, I'll make it up to you. "

Chapter 7 - I Wanted More For You

"Can you sit down?" he clamly asks her, sliding a chair out with his foot, from under the table.

Chapter 6 - Have A Little Faith In Me

They had a wonderful morning together, the family eating breakfast with the crew and band that stayed at the hotel.